FARKLE LAND

2010-11-08T11:45:00.001-08:00

Breathing In Clean Air

2010-01-01T17:23:00.001-08:00

See... I'm still alive.

Where's Mexico?

2009-09-02T22:42:00.000-07:00

Hello... bet ya thought I fell overboard, huh? Crusing is awesome minus the sea sickness. Problem was, I wasn't sick at all. That patch of which was slapped on my neck to protect me, had me nearly puking. Once removed, the rocking became soothing, the putrified feeling dissapated. Now home, imaginary waves still slam me into walls, proving without a shawdow of a doubt... yes, I am a salty sea dog! And Mexico? A very small space of which was heavily guarded by military men with machine guns. Three ports of call visted by us were a pathtic representation of this country. I have still yet to see the countryside. Damn... What did I see? Woolworths. Dad was driven to be the first to get to it, hence his rights to be the leader were taken away. He did however barter his way into the most awesome pair of boater shorts, ever. Skinny white legs bared, marching humbly behind the rest of the family. Those fancy new bloomers wilting in the 107% heat. For gawds sake dad, keep your legs crossed.
Home now, we waddle our way to and fro with the extra ten pounds gained. Leo, Nisha, Ashly, and all the others whom catered to this family... my sincerest apologies.
Farkle

I Don't Call Myself

2009-08-20T09:20:00.000-07:00

Robi, a coworker and friend confirmed for me that our age is playing catchup. Showing the shortcut from the store to my house, harrowing.
"Give me your phone number in case you lose me."
"Umm... let's see. I don't call myself.... its... uh... 400-400-4000."
Her pause was suspicious, leading me to a test call. "This phone has not been set up for voice messaging yet." What? Her phones on, I see it glowing.
"Robi, are you sure that's the right number?"
Yea... its 400-400-4000."
Trying again... nope... doesn't work.
"YOU SURE? Let me see your phone."
Uh wrong sista... it's, 400-009-1000. Gawd....
Moving from the parking lot, (twenty minutes later) I continue calling, pointing out landmarks. (We need this as we get older) We conquer the five miles without incident, but still I hesitate.

Note to myself; Leave Robi the GPS.
Farkle

Ha... I'm Still Alive

2009-08-19T09:19:00.000-07:00

Flying out Saturday leaving my "Land of obsessions" behind. Of course this will have me twitter-pated and confused, leaving but one word to describe me. Freeeak! My biggest dilemma will be finding flip flops that can be worn with an evening gown by Saturday. Oh... and those new tidy white-ees that don't show pantie lines. Ace on the other hand is packed and raring to go. New tennies resting on suitcase. (The planner and the nester clash) I, on the other hand have my groddy's tossed in the closet somewhere, yet to be found. My philosophy? Forgotten just means boughten later. (is that word?)
Timing my Kombucha making so cat babysitter isn't staring at slimy floaty things has not been easy. Once again... it's hard to be me.
Farkle

Another Obsession... Great...

2009-08-13T23:36:00.000-07:00

Oh no... I'm addicted to "Farm Ville." Help me...
Farkle

Ego Feeds Our Fears

2009-08-12T23:16:00.001-07:00

So the cruise is like... uh... I don't know... 10 days away? Ace is the walking calculator, not I. Excited yes, (duh) but that doesn't alleviate the worries for my cats. Pets? No... family. Knowing fare well that they are as attached to me and my routines, as I to theirs. Creatures of habit, both they and I. Leaving us both well trained in the area of needs. They suck up to me like none other, affectionately doling out lovings as if I'm the Goddess of the jungle. That is... till they get what they want. (food) The I can't live without you routines, flopping on the floor... screaming for belly rubs and chin-ny scratches while others aren't even afforded a glance. This of course makes me super human special and that in turn makes worry. Ludicrous to some... but very real and gut wrenching to me.
My parental figures are just as neurotic. (where'd you think the problem came from?) The dog... the baby... the one with super intellect and a very catchy name of Zena, the princess warrior. (Spelling certain words is mandated around her)
Heaving sigh; Lets face it... so long as they're fed and bulging over indulged buda bellies get some scratches... we probably won't even be missed. Freeeeeaks...
Farkle

FHA Accepted Us!

2009-08-10T21:47:00.001-07:00

We passed our inspection leaving the formality's of rewriting the new loan to get under way. Yay! Our appraisal was about where I had the numbers crunched at, shy 5000 bucks. Buying the house at 119,000 at the end of 1999, it's value increasing to $215,000. Our new interest rate of 4.5 has my doing the yippee skip-pee. (it was 5.87)
Where have I been the last of couple days? Fighting Ace for the computer. My "Face book" farm has been hijacked by my now obsessed husband. Staring at the computer for hours waiting for his crop to grow. (it's mine... damn it!)
Two more weeks and we set sail for the Mexican Riviera. To bad my flip flops of assorted colors and styles, bought for the trip look like my garden tools. Barefoot in my formal will be a trend-setter for sure...
Farkle

Killing Me Slowly

2009-08-08T19:31:00.000-07:00

Here's the story. Typed a sentence, one sentence... and it made absolutely no sense. If it makes no sense to me... it's worthless for my cyberspace journal. So tired today was I, sugar and caffeine were useless. Attempts to function as a living, breathing entity had me guzzling Pepsi and coffee like a long haul trucker from Texas.
Schedules were made for a reason, logic isn't part of it. Today sucked.
Farkle

Robbed And Still Dry!

2009-08-07T09:27:00.000-07:00

Tonights closing shift at Maggot Foods will be very uncomfortable. (excuse me while I adjust) My shifts from now through next week are closers. Rumored that "Depends" has suddenly taken huge leap in sales... has me rushing to my 401k. Hopefully they will be offering options to purchase stock in a business that seems to be booming. Certainly there is truth in this rumor, we've been sold out at Maggot Foods for days. Odd...
Farkle

Collapsing Fascination

2009-08-06T21:12:00.000-07:00

Update on the hoarder; Informing us she plans to stay in Eastern Washington for the next two years has me digging in the dirt franticly. Planting tall, fast growing evergreens faster then I can buy them. Her home has recently become a refuge for the deer, tall grasses and blackberry bushes providing that seclusion they so love. This is I don't mind. Nor does the fact that a one eyed coon with five babies residing inside the house get me twitter-pated. (Hey, it's warm and cozy)
Dilapidated, this looming yellow monster has become more then a grotesque eyesore. It imprisons me. Stealing my attention (short span that it is) while taking away the beauty of my own flowers and garden. The vice like grip of fascination has loosened, leaving choke hold marks on my neck. Sputtering one word over and over... gross.
Farkle

In Less Then 24 Hours...

2009-08-05T20:36:00.000-07:00

This is gonna be an insane attempt at being brief. Appraiser came and left but not without a taste as to whom she's just dealt with. Checking my homeowners fees meant logging on to the laptop. Leaving her free to Wander from room to room, measuring, turning on the water, etc, etc.
Oh dear gawd... where is she going? Jumping up, my foot tangles in the cord. SSSSHiiiiit... shit... shit... shit. Flying face first across the room, she rushes to my aid.
That voice, one I'm unfamiliar with repeating over and over, "Are you okay?"
"Shit." Composing myself... rough.

Then the phone call today from my bud, "The Italian Stallion." We closed last night and it was my good fortune to have gotten off at 10pm. At 10:40 we got robbed. Well kinda of...
Brief synopsis;
Handed a note that read, "Stay cool and give me your money."

Italians response: The look... the one that says your kidding right?(not) "Fuck you! FUUUUCK YOU!"

911 responded, and a block down the road he was captured. Had it been me? I'd merely have wet myself before hitting the concrete.
All in a days work.
Farkle

Freeeeeak!

2009-08-04T22:50:00.000-07:00

Ya gotta love my job, I just got home. "The Appraisers" arrival early tomorrow will have me franticly chasing my tail. Today, (before my 1-10 shift) I washed all the woodwork in the house, doors, closets, cupboards... all of it. Knowing fare well it's ridiculous to clean that which will go unnoticed. Enormous is my problem with perfection, I know this to be true. Learning to "just do" and not ask for help. (hinting is good) My fingers are crossed that Ace senses my distress and mowed the lawn today. Otherwise I will be mopping, vacuuming, scrubbing, and doing lawn work all before the money man arrives. I want this refinance to go off without a hitch. Gawd... it's hard to be me.
Farkle

Three Schleps In An Aztec

2009-08-03T20:51:00.001-07:00

What was supposed to get done today didn't. What a schlep. It was my parental figures whom corrupted and misguided me into gambling up most of my day. My five bucks in the mail and another five for gray hair, allowed me to play for several hours. Of course we first had to find said destination. Driving merrily down the highway, windshield wipers swaying back and forth we chattered. Being 80% and dry might have been cause for concern, but my dad was driving.
"Damn it! That's the problem with this car. Blinker and wipers are on the same stick."
There was only one more tiny problem. Instead of ending up at said destination, (casino) we ended up at Summit Lake.
"Umm... dad? We just passed the Summit Lake store. You didn't take our exit."
"Whaaaat?" (it was a pretty drive)
Ten bucks turned into twenty four leaving me vindicated from loser hood, so all ended good.
With the appraiser coming in two days, one of those days donated to Maggot Foods, little time is left to obsess about cleaning. Carpet cleaning, intense bathroom scrubs, yard work, blah... blah... blah. However, I did make time for the mole, known better as the little bastardo. Yup, dining at my house shall come to an end (tonight) as the grim reaper (me) sips on wine.
Farkle

It's Worth A Shot

2009-08-02T22:29:00.000-07:00

Mastering Kombucha making while adding some of my own twists to it's flavor has been fun and rewarding. Tonights batch carbonating on top of my fridge was flavored with fresh ginger and lime. This latest endeavor has many a nose turning upward, non believers of holistic remedies. Personally believing, placing ones entire health and well being in the hands of pharmaceutical companies is like playing with dynamite and matches. Sure, there are medications required for health and well being, but when there are other, better alternatives, such as diet and exercise... why don't you just drink poison.

Taking three Ibuprofen morning and night for the last five years has not been easy on my stomach. Recently the need has lessened more and more. Maybe it's the green shake with flax seed, or just maybe... it's the kombucha. Yes, the possibility that it's all in my head has crossed my mind... but ya know what? It's all about results.
Farkle

Somethings Amiss

2009-08-01T21:50:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been so tired, you washed your face, then moisturized it with hair gel? Smells pretty...
Farkle

Is There A Pill For Green?

2009-07-31T09:01:00.000-07:00

Gone will be the "Italian Stallion" and "Clueless in Goldcreek," when I return from my cruise. My entire life spent and shared with these people, pathetically tortured by my insanity for 26 long years. All of us with quirks, irritating, whispered about, while stink eyes were thrown like daggers. With this came a very intricate relationship as our lives intertwined. Years have passed... as have marriages, sorrows, moments of elation, children woes, (that never has ended) and death. Some of my best memories have been with you and some of my worst. Gawd... don't go.
Farkle

Nice Cap

2009-07-30T08:08:00.000-07:00

It started at 4am. (she's insane) Wandering from room to room, the wailing. Tortuously drawn out, soulful chords ranging from high to low. I have know doubt gender plays a role in her flair for the devices used to capture the attention of whom it is directed at. (me) Knowing of no female that wouldn't admit as a child, practicing until perfected... that pathetic look in front of a mirror. (it works when your five) Just maybe it was the air-conditioning... she's too cold. (poor thing) But if you see Ace with a new coon skin cap, I'm the one who made it.
Farkle

Moms Inferno

2009-07-28T11:52:00.000-07:00

Imprisoned again while the wench can be heard cackling. Snow captured in my freezer from winters end shall be tossed onto our paver's as revenge is had. Chortles, my chortles will be heard by her... whilst her puke bubbles on the ground. The only sounds heard... my flip flops dashing for shelter as my finger is raised to the heavens... Bitch!
Farkle

Dead Battery Sets Tone For Pemco :(

2009-07-27T21:33:00.001-07:00

One little fibber, one... My trip to Mexico looming has caused agonized scrutiny of my white aging bod. Not pretty, especially those scrawny legs. Without Aces knowledge, I purchased ten tanning visits. See it was him whom wanted to go tanning and I convinced him it was a waste of money. Poor Ace, beside himself. Wifey poo, browning nicely while he remained white. (must be the Indian in me) Who wants to sail the Mexican Rivera and look half dead? Slyly my visits have occurred after work and before, but not today. So with plenty of time before my Pemco appointment I caught a few rays. I might add my rock star parking at the front door of Liz's Indoor Sun had me grinning. :) To bad my battery was dead when I attempted to leave. (Idea!) My parents will rescue me. (sorta) Flailing my arms, they drive right by me. Chasing them down Capitol Way was most embarrassing.

"I have an appointment with Pemco to sign papers at 2:00. Can you take me?"

"Pemco," once again you suck. Papers weren't ready. The old people were waiting in the car in a 100% heat wave. You were given fair notice and I might add, it was at your insistence I make an appointment. Even calling you twice today, letting you know the exact time. Your reassuring voice thanking me for all the notice.
"Look, I don't why your figure is different now then the one you quoted me... just show me where to sign."
Of course her computer wasn't cooperating either. Blah... blah... and blah. (Didn't she say I just had to come in and sign?)
"Look, my parents are sitting in the car, just mail me the papers.(sigh)
Returned to my dead car, assuring my parents, "No worries," just drop me off. Walked to Starbucks and waited once more for my knight in shining armor, Ace. So busted.
Farkle
Note to Pemco; Learning how to maneuver

your

sites refresher course... highly recommended. Blah...

No Talking

2009-07-25T21:02:00.001-07:00

Just sat down.... (sigh)

Iced Game Hens

2009-07-24T21:32:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, customers mistakenly thought it was a full moon. Ideally, (in my world) chucking frozen game hens vehemently at your heads, baring my teeth would be most rewarding. You say your sandwich bag didn't close correctly and how come we don't have that spice you loved so much when you were in Africa. Do I look like God? Is it possible that rapid blinks will render your mouth useless and at the same time, stop my pounding head?

Today... whilst I sipped kombucha, flinging your groceries as my body crackles and pops, I think of tomorrow. Two more days and I'm off. Woot!
Farkle

Mastery Of Time

2009-07-23T09:38:00.001-07:00

No, Olympia Federal does not match other loan rates, however... the rate offered was phenomenal and I didn't expect them to counter. Understanding of the current market and in keeping with excellent customer, I was told to go for it.
My typical behavior flourished and the fire set. Within a matter of hours the paperwork was filled, signed, faxed and accepted. Waiting is the worst. It being FHA loan, the prerequisites are lengthy but if all goes well it will close in 25 days. (sigh)
Tracking my husband down for his pay stub? (oh boy)
"Where are you?"
"Doing a delivery." I'm on the freeway."
"Ya got your pay stub with you?"
"Yea........"
"I need it"
"NOW?"
(duh) "Uh yea, I need to fax everything within 48 hours.
(expletive#!#!#!!)
Spotting him as I pull into the parking lot. Semi truck, Ace and pay stub.
The end? Not... had coffee with the queen, then browsed a foo foo shop, visited my parents, harvested tons in the garden, ran for more freezer bags, re watched video on kombucha a few thousand times more. Tackling it without a hitch, leaving Ace gagging on the couch. Demanding to know all ingredients used. (for the ER)
Mmmm.... it's delicious, carbonated, and.... I'm still breathing.
Farkle

Will Olympia Federal Show Pemco The Error Of It's Way?

2009-07-20T21:40:00.000-07:00

Disrupting the balance of things is not something a person with obsessive behavior is inclined so to do. Questioning my thought processes due to the causes and effects of change. My home mortgage is locked in at a 30 year, 5.875% and now an offer stands to reduce it substantially . Locking in at 4.5%, 15 year loan. Tomorrow may be the day that my home banking with "Olympia Federal" ends. They've been good to me for well over twenty five years, allowing me the opportunity to purchase homes with reasonable rates and great customer service. Also inclusive in this fact, they supported a single woman and mother in the acquisition of the home I reside in now. Signing on the dotted line will be postponed until tomorrow, allowing they whom have supported me a chance to counter offer. My home debt is minuscule in comparison to most. As far as being a big power player in the market of borrowing money, I am not. Yet... I still hope the thread of good customer service will remain intact and they will match the offer. In regards to my banking situations, loyalty has always served me well.

Uh... to bad I can't say the same for an insurance company. You know who you are...
Farkle

Asian Persuasion But Mostly Caucasian

2009-07-19T13:00:00.000-07:00

Now plopped in a recliner, an extra shot of espresso coursing through my veins keeping me upright... I savor the quiet. Little, Brian, and baby have headed out leaving Ace and I belly-up. Last night they arrived fashionably late, extending our visit into the wee hours. Baby Leo creating diversions here and there, making sure he wasn't left out of the conversation. Showing off his new mastery of interpretations. That of a ninety year old man missing most of his teeth, tormented by a severe case of dementia. Likewise... there was the brandishing a characteristic of which I'm all too familiar with. An affliction effecting four generations that I know of. In a word... drama. Yup, if he's mastered it at "one," I can't wait to see "two."
Why old people don't have babies? (heaving sigh) Refill please...
Farkle

Evening

2009-07-18T20:14:00.000-07:00

As evening settles, Ace and I relax in our backyard paradise, Pandora entertains us with music of our liking. The night air refreshingly extinguishes the fire from the sun. Hummingbirds still contently feeding on the bee balm, wings making the sounds of bees as their flight takes them rapidly from one flower to the next. As dusk settles these visitors will be replaced by the bats and coons. Unfortunately... it's also time for mosquitos. I'm outa here!

Little and grand baby number two... should be arriving any minute. Woot!
Farkle

Twitter Dee And Twitter Dum...

2009-07-17T20:40:00.000-07:00

Entertainment generated by the computer can be endless. Stupefying me is the part where Twitter sucks people in, like my Hoover wind tunnel after a popcorn kernel spitting match. What the hell do I care if you just took a poop or your dishwasher is full. The entire premise of Twitter is to stay in touch with your friends via the Internet, but give me a break. This new mindset of people, having to sharing the most mundane things they're doing at any giving moment. Friends, spouses, and family members... all understand quiet moments in life are normal and healthy. Being silly is one thing... but Twitter? I have but one word, retarded.
Farkle

What The Hell Is She Drinking?

2009-07-15T22:10:00.000-07:00

Annie gave me a brilliant idea. Boiling on the stove a new concoction to keep me energized. Fresh ginger, blueberries, dried cranberry's, and some honey for sweetness, all simmering for tomorrows hellish day at work. When done, I shall toss in green and black tea, allow it to steep, strain and then chill. Mmm... Farkles energy drink of choice. ( store bought = schizoid!)
Farkle sleeps

"Sprouting Off"

2009-07-14T09:03:00.000-07:00

Today's post is dedicated to "Sprouting Off."
Farkle

Hey, Pemco!

2009-07-13T09:01:00.000-07:00

Look, unless you're prepared to read about nothingness, give up my blog!
Yes, I've been checking other insurances. Yes, I've found better prices. AND... yes, I just need to get my butt in gear. Leaving Farkle's frustration and dust at your doorstep. MY problem? Prioritizing. Fighting insurance companies, last on my bucket list. Crap...
Farkle

Wired

2009-07-12T21:46:00.000-07:00

I said never again... but did it anyway. Two weeks of set schedules left me sleeping nicely and then the unspeakable. (back to work) So... yesterday 12-9 had me slamming an energy drink. (Wired)
Speech became tangled into knots, making me sound like a foreigner from space. What the hell? Bedtime rolled around, schizophrenia set in, and those voices. My head still hurts. Promise to myself; Never, ever again.
Made kombucha today, taking pictures of junior like any proud parent would do. Fingers crossed, hoping for twins. In seven or eight days, a baby will be born Yay! Hey... maybe I can make some money at this. Kombucha farming... oh yea baby, $$$$$$$.
Farkle

Kombucha Tea

2009-07-10T20:58:00.000-07:00

My latest endeavor, making kombucha tea. At first glance, the scoby looks like cow tongue floating in a mason jar. Thus making my first encounter slightly nauseating. Okay... I wanted to puke. My "kombucha mother" was gifted from one of Annies neighbors, obviously deserving of her new name, "Brave Heart." (grinning) Soon, snoozing in a bassinet, (okay a jar) kombucha babies. Herb Deb will become the recipient of my first babe... I'm hoping for twins! So after watching the video... like a gazillion times, I'm excited to buy some jars and get to work birthing. Proudly posting a picture of my newest offspring... please, lets give a big welcome to "Hiroko." (Japanese name meaning 1) "abundant child," 2) "prosperous child," or 3) "generous child.")
Annie, it will be you... whom enjoys the first sip of my home brew.
Farkle

Lindsey Baum

2009-07-09T23:17:00.000-07:00

She's still not home. Ten year old Lindsey Baum, vanished into thin air a few weeks ago from McCleary Washington. Several blocks from where we sat snacking on sandwiches, sipping wine and watching "The secret life of bees." In this tiny little town, a dark and sinister presence now resides. Terrorizing not only this small community but the entire nation. My heart aches for her and her family, as do many others. Turning on the evening news night after night, my thoughts return to her and the mystery of her disappearance. Only serving to remind us all how precious and vulnerable our children are. Safe return... Lindsey.
Farkle

Welcoming Jon

2009-07-08T22:04:00.000-07:00

Perfection is not a pretty word for some, more like a curse. Obsessing on everything one does, sees, hears, and feels describes this affliction with great accuracy. Few can fill these shoes, nor would they want to. Its toll is emotionally and physically draining. Most challenging for those afflicted, the inability to to just walk away. Jon... welcome to my world and I'm guessing yours.
Farkle

"Pemco"

2009-07-07T09:02:00.000-07:00

Seems feelings have been hurt in the cooperate world of Pemco. Disturbing that which has created angst and loathing in mine. Ironically, these hurt feelers have generated responses to the "Pemco" post of which I had written. (This makes me smile)
Insert here; Some who write are comment whores. Driven by the need to know who's reading that which they have so eloquently put on paper or in my case, cyberspace. In sorts, this category of people herein ... is I. Hence the stat counter. Not really caring as to who you are, but where you have came from.
The post, Kiss My Ass, "Pemco," now is generating peals of laughter. For this I graciously thank you. Receiving two comments thus far, both from Pemco employees. This was not a personal attack on you, but your company. So with that being said, it was nice to meet you.

I'm a lot like you.
But a little different.
Farkle

2009-07-06T08:44:00.000-07:00

We've entertained the idea for years. Planting leyland cypress along the fence line that borders the hoarders house. (rhymes) Ten years ago it was a raspberry patch. Not very attractive in the winter, unruly, stickery, and the privacy factor, nil. Second idea was just as bad... scatter planting. We still saw the house on the hill and the weeds just kept on coming. Poor Ace... he and his unhappy wife are still having to contend with
rubbernecking the house of horrors.
A fresh slate would mean ripping out the old plantings. No... screams the tree hugger! Ace shudders, the shovel handed to him from his smiling wifey poo. (Luv ya babe!) He digs and digs, salvaging all so far. (he's not done) Replanting them in our nursing bed, (my idea!) till replanting begins.
The barberry bush; Six feet in diameter, it's home already designated by wifey poo. My attempts at digging, providing space for a root system that looks like a twenty year old maple, was met with Ace shoving me outa the way. (mans work, ya know)
Ace, "He bit me! The little bastard bit me!"
Circling above his head a swarm of bees. "RUN!" (and he did).

Ace and plan A, "Where's my duct tape, woman? Damn it... never mind I found it.
"Please tell me your not gonna..."
He did...
Plan B is now in effect. (visiting local home improvement store for bee killer)
As we sit on the couch, nursing our wounds. His bee sting and I, with my broken finger... we reflect.
The splendiforous wall of China, we welcome you... Golden Rider Leyland Cypress

Hideaway

2009-07-05T09:51:00.000-07:00

It was a war zone last night. My construction of the bomb shelter is nearly complete. Keeping me entertained while keeping my nasty assed, foul mood in check. (Ace just watches) Digging of the 10 ft by 10 ft hole took minimal time, leftover retaining wall bricks, used for flooring. Support walls, material leftover from demolition of new room. Time of completion, exactly two hours, thirty three minutes, and twenty one seconds. The only thing left, a little decor. (gawd...)
"Aaaace... I need your help. Does this look better over here...... or over there.....

The sun hath come up, Farkle

Kiss My Ass, "Pemco"

2009-07-04T20:03:00.000-07:00

I am in a nasty ass mood, foul if you will, and can't think of a worst topic to discuss, insurance. Stopping by to say "Hi!" to parental figures didn't help change my not so charming self. Somehow, someway, (I'm still kicking myself) the conversation turned to "Pemco." (Oh Mr.UPS driver, where is my "I hate Pemco bumper stickers")
It was they whom sung their praises, their glory, and it was I who bought into it. Unfortunately for Ace and I, our premiums have continued to rise while theirs have continued to drop. (somebody's gotta pay for your reductions, eh?) Five years free of any claims, the entire time spent with them. No tickets, close to a fire station, I'm not in the ghetto, I pay my bills, I have excellent credit and minimal debt. I'm American, damit! Questioning their ethics as to how they determine who pays what.
It would be a foolish person whom would suggest to ME, the possibility points were taken away based on occupations. Skydiving demerits... okay... race car driver... well I'm getting that... but sales clerk? Give me a frickin break. I Hate Pemco... I HATE PEMCO... and allow me add one more thing... PEMCO SUCKS!
Oh, and toss in the fact I don't wanna go back... Death before Maggot Foods :(
Slightly irritated, cranky, tear streaked, Farkle
PS: Woot, happy 4th of July, woot... woot

Aug, Sept, Oct, and November... See ya!

2009-07-03T21:19:00.001-07:00

Three days with my best bud and the last few of my vacation. :( I have avoided the hole like a plague for two weeks, forcing myself thru the doors only once to peek at my schedule. (sigh) Totally depressing myself...
Farkle

The Children Of Leningradsky

2009-07-02T16:31:00.001-07:00

Steering clear of this particular documentary for years, touching a chord that's a tad too close to home. A story of Russian children abandoned by their own society. Shamefully it is not just the Russians guilt to bear, but the entire worlds. How on earth does one just walk away?
Farkle

more about "The Children Of Leningradsky, Nominat...", posted with vodpod

Fear Factor

2009-07-02T10:12:00.000-07:00

If I'd stared into that glass ball years ago, my life today would have been bleak. Decisions made were always foolish, but truth be told, I don't believe I ever really made decisions. Confidence has never been my attribute, instead fear paralyzed and manipulated my life.
Taking control of the helm has opened up doors that are amazing. No longer residing in me, that girl who was led everywhere. Meek and hidden within herself.
Perhaps it's age, lessening the fear of opening those doors. I'm just not sure. But what I do know... is the doors that have opened now, all have been my decision. Good or bad. Happily my choices have served me well. New beginnings with happy endings. Leery still are my steps, those demons are still there. Now a raging battle has begun, taking them all on... and slowly conquering each and every one.
Driving home late last night, I smiled. Rolling down the window and turning up the music. Friendships which have developed are true, my husband is a saint, and I'm finally happy within my own skin.
Farkle

Slightly Different

2009-06-30T21:43:00.000-07:00

Hidden behind the slatting on the windows, I see him. Slowly maneuvering his way across the vacant lot.
The area is rapidly developing in preparation for Sam Waltons infiltration into it's community. A community that is ill prepared for his entrance and the devastation that will soon reak havoc on it's small businesses. Sounds of heavy equipment carry through the air as traffic is redirected through a maze of madness.
The very fact he's dressed completely in white rayon, complete with turban, is what makes him stand out amongst the others. Remaining mesmerized, I spot two small children racing across the field. The smallest, peddling a trike, leaving the older child a chance to up her pace, allowing her to reach him first. They embrace, a hug that speaks of the role of which he plays in their lives. The smaller child soon reaches him, greeted with that same familiar glance and hug. Walking now together, holding hands, destination unknown. I smile... a grandpa in any language is still... grandpa.
Farkle

Two More Falsies

2009-06-29T20:48:00.000-07:00

Dually crowns were done today, draining me of my life force. As far as fear factors go, dentists are right up there with large social gatherings and Dr's offices. Any of the above events drains that energy that most people have a hard time keeping up with. This evening, sleeping through a Tsunami is quite possible... especially since I don't live by the ocean.

Hoarder update:
Dropping off two bags of cat food for her abandoned kitty, matted and lonely it sits at my back door. She has informed me she might stay there for two years.
Insanely doing the happy dance in my head, I envision the "For sale sign" going up. "So ya gonna sell?" Gawd... I think my voice is shaking.
"Na... where would I go?"
Crap...
Farkle

Just Walk Away Renee...

2009-06-27T20:52:00.000-07:00

What a bum. Slug like and lackadaisical, I meander about the house. Only one bad bout with rearranging, starting out small then taking up an entire day, striving for perfection. Soon turning into not one but two, then three and oh no... here I go again. Miss Obsessive, the neighborhood whack job. Blah.
Today we celebrated Elle's 33rd. She and grandson #2 have the same birthday, June 22, thus aiding me in my old age not to forget either. I finally got to meet Willow, "O's" proclaimed to be girlfriend. Jeez... he's four and she's in her thirties. Actually, shes a wonderful photographer that has taken family photos for Elle in exchange for web design. (So this is the woman who stole my grandsons heart!)
As of now, I'm vegging once again. Drinking my newest concoction, made with boiled fresh ginger, lemon, honey and Braggs vinegar. Mmm...
Shh... guess who just pulled up. Yup... I'll be soon peering through the bushes. With tonights glass of wine, free entertainment.
Fascinated Farkle

Is It Me?

2009-06-26T19:49:00.000-07:00

Am I in heaven? Confessing to the fact that the last few days I didn't get out of my jamies till noon. Woot!
Catastrophes... hmm... lets start with today and get up and personal. Getting out of bed, hobbling to the bathroom and attempting to mind my own so as to take care of business. My damn cats ritualistically tripping me as yell profanitys at them. It's so annoying. Every frickin morning it's the same thing... all the way into the bathroom. As I release that which wakes many in the middle of the night, I attempt to put the bottom half of my jammers on. How? I know not... but as I release that which I've held... well... it's a tad to late. One of my jammie legs is in the toilet. Enough said. Then the other day I was stuck in "Micheals" for two hours, losing my damn perscription glasses. Confronting every employee, walking every isle a gazillion times. Scrutinizing every nook and cranny cause we all know nothing is ever simple for me. By the way, to the lady who just started her shift that day... kiss my ass. Anyhoo... finally resolving myself to the fact that those babies are gone for good. Sad faced I head to my car, when an old lady stops and asks me whats wrong.
"Lost my glasses. Usually I find them on my head but not today." Almost to my car I hear her again.
"Waaaait."
Looking over at the old woman and the van parked right next to her. Hand extended from it's window... my glasses.
"Where'd you find them?"
"Hanging on the rack right there."
Yup... they never even made through the door.
Farkle

It Grew In A Vegetable Patch

2009-06-24T20:47:00.000-07:00

Oh man... porky is in my freezer. Poor old gal.. 400lbs of lovins... now bacon, ham hocks, chops, roasts, ribs, sausage, and one big old fatty ham. Gawd...
Oh and Adu... well I put my cards on the table in a nice sort of way... we can be friends but your not moving in and guess who hasn't been heard from since?
Farkle

"Sprout" Wins Tonights Post

2009-06-23T21:07:00.001-07:00

Tonight my post has been dedicated to "Sprouting Off" as Farkle Land gets snubbed.
Farkle

Porky

2009-06-22T21:35:00.000-07:00

I'm having a hard time with the idea of "Porky." What the hell is this porky thing I speak of? The story goes like this; A cute little pig with a pink nose and blue eyes, lived the good life on a farm. On this farm he was loved and fed only the best grains and soy. Along come three wenchs and a man whom decide that "Porky" would make good bacon. Oh gawd... Wednesday he hits my freezer.
Farkle

Adu

2009-06-21T18:42:00.000-07:00

Acquiring a new friend from Africa has been most interesting. Learning of another's culture first hand has kept me intrigued enough to write him every day. Heading to the other side of the house to my laptop. He on the other hand must walk thirty minutes to use an internet cafes computer. No car... he walks. Living in Ghana and working in a place called Ahwiaa, he makes crafts for his living. Comparing Ahwiaa to a culture art section, he himself calls it a craft city. He's asked if I'm a pure white woman and pure I'm not so sure about. =D
Twi is his native language although he does fairly well with English. (Some deciphering is required) Oh the things we take for granted. Such as homes with all their amenities, cars, food, etc... Adu lives in a one room round hut with five friends. I've learned much from this correspondence and am honored to have him as my friend.

By the way, Ace now has become a US Marshall...
Farkle

Happily Exhausted

2009-06-20T19:22:00.000-07:00

Busy... "O" had another sleepover, returning him back this morning to watch hockey practice. Beaming with pride, a little face peeks from time to time at his babada and dedu. Warranting over exaggerated applause as he grins and waves. Confidence no longer lacking, red cheeked he now effortlessly skates while holding his stick. The "Help I've Fallen And Can't Get UP!" syndrome is no longer present. Now discovering that "Yes, Yes, I CAN!" (Yay!) As one little boy lays on his back, the coach grabs a hockey stick and begins to spin him round and round. (I'd puke) Then another strange phenomenon occurs. The rink soon turns into a human bowling alley, looking like domino's as they all fall to the ice, wanting a turn at being spun.

Oregon is on the agenda for tomorrow, celebrating Leo's first birthday but today I shopped till I dropped for summer dresses. (all on close out!) Evidently cruising on a ship requires more then my casual closet contains. Dear gawd... get your camara... she's wearing a dress.
Farkle

One More Day

2009-06-18T22:31:00.000-07:00

Getting ready for an early shift, my last for two weeks! Woot! Vacations rock...
Farkle

He Loved It!

2009-06-17T21:46:00.000-07:00

So... the four year has gone home to mommy and daddy as babada plops into a recliner. Such a wonderful couple of days spent with family and friends. Yesterday the Italian delighted O and another with exclusive rights to a school bus. Touring the bus barn and all the behind scenes that go with taking good care of them. Such as maintenance. Pity the mechanic whom was a champ, answering a quadrillion questions concerning the engines, vacuums, hoses, and anything and everything that moved or didn't move.
It was a day to reflect, serving to remind me what a good friends I have.
Farkle

Watch that bump!

2009-06-16T06:59:00.000-07:00

Standing by the fire station waiting for the school bus, an array of children. Chattering amongst themselves as they wait. Once in a while a child can be witnessed craning their neck in an attempt to catch a glimpse of the bus. Creating a static charge that soon has them all looking down the long stretch of road. The fog is heavy and her sweater did nothing in the way of keeping her warm. Maybe not the best choice but it looked so damn cool and isn't that's what it's all about? She's standing amongst the group, gangly and slightly standoffish. A wisp of a girl, appearing tomboyish as she blows imaginary smoke into the air. What the hell? It's me.
"Hey O, ya ready to go ride the school bus? This is gonna be fun!" Mmhmm....
Farkle

Who Are You?

2009-06-15T21:48:00.000-07:00

What is going on here? My email has been flooded with visitors introducing themselves as my latest blog followers. Eerily becoming a cult leader perhaps? (gawd) A minutiae space on the internet, contributing nothing in the way of news worthy information. So what gives? Hackers perhaps making a insane attempt to gain control of my fortune? Hah... good luck! First off... I have to have money. (duh) Whoever you are, I'm not buying into the fact you are reading the insanity of one woman's ranting and ravings about nothing.
Paranoid Farkle

Entertainment Tonight

2009-06-14T22:17:00.000-07:00

Happily watching "Rocky Balboa," oblivious to the rest of the world, Ace. Barf. Tonight I'll be watching the "Eleventh Hour," another documentary from Evergreen College borrowed from "Earth Herb." Produced and narrated by Leonardo DiCaprio, a film about global ecological collapse. I am allowing Ace one shot, a freebie courtesy retort for my choice of entertainment.
"Barf."
So there ya have it. Rocky in one room and Change The World in another. What a couple of dorks.
Farkle

Sweet, Sweet, Saturday

2009-06-13T18:18:00.000-07:00

What a spectacular day. My not having to blurt those four words, "I'll be there in spirit." Physically present for my nephew Zacc's graduation party is a sampling of what I hope still is to come. Good food, family and friends celebrating another momentous occasion. Leaving a trail of dust behind as high school becomes only a memory. Finding that niche in life that will pay your bills and hopefully not have you hating that morning get up call. Pursuing a career as a fireman sounds like the perfect fit for those size 14 feet!

Well let's see, I have to go back to work tomorrow, struggle through two days of hell, and then... uh... uh... Oh that's right, then I'm off for three days. Woot! The "Italian Stallion" (also a school bus driver) is snatching (I hope they don't miss it) a bus on Tuesday and I'm snagging "O." The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round. Hey, quit your laughing, it's gonna be fun. How many people do you know that can steal a school bus just long enough for it not to be missed and if so shamefully blurt out the culprits names? Grinning while pointing his bony finger at a group of four year olds, "They made me do it!"
Farkle

Something Pretty

2009-06-12T23:02:00.000-07:00

Poor John... he was kicked out of my space today, replaced with something warm and cozy. Old Mr. Wayne now is heading to the other side of the house, joining Ace in his john. Guilty as charged for being an inconsiderate wife, selfishly replacing Mr. Wayne's spot on the wall with something pretty. (giggling)
"Uh... Excuse me? That's not nice to call your wife a "Jack Ass."
Farkle

Another Hurdle

2009-06-11T08:52:00.000-07:00

First allow me to brag. Yesterday my over the top cleaning was not done. (yay) A few extras were done the day before, but... I didn't mow the lawn, water or obsess to the point of exhaustion. That's my norm when it comes to guests. Picking up items necessitated for dinner had me marveling at the other grocery store. Whoa... the realization of what my store lacks when shopping conscientiously for healthy food really is astounding. Spending beyond what was budgeted. Going back to my point, OCD; baby steps...
"Clueless in Goldcreek" brought Margaritas, "Earth Herb," almost the entire dinner. Crab, chicken, and all the amenities that go with quesadiallas. Mmm... I made Mexican rice and cornbread. Next time cutting up jalapeños will be done with gloves. Ooo... hands on ice the entire day. Documentaries from Evergreen State are not everyones cup of tea, hence Ace spent a lot of time in the kitchen blending Margaritas. I wish my daughter could see the movie "Toxic Sludge." Most certainly she... like I would never use anything again from a waste treatment plant. Oh the power of money and advertising.
Farkle

Wobbly Necked

2009-06-10T22:02:00.001-07:00

Don't feel like fighting with the computer tonight. It's neck is broken and I've had way too much tequila.
Farkle

Broadening Our Minds

2009-06-09T07:17:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow an eclectic group of people are gathering at my house for dinner and a movie. We have an array of choices to pick from, all of which are educational. Our entertainment is furnished by "Earth Herb," all of which pertain to the saving the environment. (My love of a good documentary is a driving force of Ace's sprouting gray hairs.) Pondering our choices of movies, my head is already echoing with heavy sighs and yawns in the audience. Don't worry I have a back up plan. (The Exorcism, Pitch Black, and last but not least, Feast Two)
Our theme will be 'Mexican Fiesta" and unfortunately Ace has informed me he can't attend.
"Uh... I didn't know you had plans for that night."
"Yup... I'm busy... sorry."
"Doing what?"
Heavy silence...
Farkle

Update

2009-06-07T08:34:00.000-07:00

Hoarder Update;
Ssh... she's back. Garbage can still sitting at end of her drive, weed protruding from it's lid. Perhaps happy with the fact it hasn't been touched, knowing her nosy neighbor hath given up. Left alone in a rats nest, emotional wounds festering along with everything else that resides up there.
Have I truly given up? Not sure... abilities to walk away from problems never has been my forte. Is it stubbornness, OCD, or just plain old empathy? Not sure about that either, but allowing her to stew alone in there... most certainly wallowing in misery might be good. She's been living in a nice apartment with cable, garbage, heat, air conditioning. All the comforts of a real home. Perhaps a taste of normality will slap her up long side of the head. That's what I'm hoping for. Okay... praying.
Farkle

Hot Dogs And More Hot Dogs

2009-06-06T21:21:00.000-07:00

My fried egg sandwich is sitting, getting cold. Pondering my day, coming up with the same scenario... Toothless people, hot dogs and buns waiting to check out. Doesn't anyone go to the dentist anymore?
Faintly I hear my name being called. Oh, it's Three buck Chuck, "Faaaarkle....."

2009-06-05T18:59:00.000-07:00

One thing that still makes me smile... no make that two!

Hoax

2009-06-05T09:37:00.000-07:00

Evidently sending out the new updated pension manual was a hoax, another ploy. Surprise... surprise. Employees trucking up in droves, speaking with unknowledgable representatives, all given different stories. The Conclusion, October is the month of change. Dirty hands deceptively manipulating lambs to the slaughter while doors and mouths remain closed. Joke of the year... "Support Your Local Union"

Farkle

Hope

2009-06-04T22:02:00.000-07:00

Maybe... just maybe... December WILL still be the day dreams come true. The Union sent out new updated pension manual, and my name is written all over it. Woot.
Arising today with a new mindset and sharing it with Ace.
"Ya know... I've decided no more drama. None."
Ace's come back, "Baby steps." (We'll just leave that one alone)

Tonight's platter... baked chicken. Cruising with the "Queen," top down, hat flying in 90% heat, left me a pretty glow in the dark... red.
Farkle

Composure?

2009-06-03T09:00:00.000-07:00

Duped again. My four hour stint never even existed... I knew the minute I walked in. Of course "Annie" was quick to point out what the scenario would be with my leaving early as the "Italian Stallion" bristled. Let's just say at this point in time "perky" would not describe me, "raging bitch" would. Quickly the drama unfolds (we're all hotheads) as I watch their two heads together. My good name muttered under their breaths. The seething sets in (I'm damn good at it) as I watch them both clomp up the stairs.
Arriving back to a check stand in front of me, the "Italian Stallion." He's pissed... I'm more pissed... (due to duping) he snubs me... I cry. Well kinda... hysterically (drama is my middle name) laughing and crying at the same time. I knew it was ridiculous... which only served to fuel a fire that was out of control. Me. Oddly... that little old man that's shuffled through my line for the last umpteen years, painfully writing his checks in slow mo, never speaking, never smiling. A major irritant for all who are painfully behind him as he takes twenty minutes just to retrieve his checkbook. Ah... not today. He delighted in my hysteria, grinning... no laughing... out loud... thanking me profusely. Jeez... could it get any worse then this? Wandering the isles in an attempt to find something for lunch, my neck prickles. Looking over I see our local schizophrenic staring at me, following me wherever I go. (he can get children's body parts off the internet and our sound system talks to him) I'm at the deli case now, he approaches attempting to make conversation and eye contact. Weird, he never looks at you. I grab my bagel, he grabs his bagel. I go checkout with him right behind me, still chattering about our food. Gawd... A night of terror, mayhem, and miracles. Woot.
Farkle

Just Another Day :(

2009-06-02T09:21:00.000-07:00

Hearing my song, "Pocket Full of Sunshine" gloriously filling the air. Opening eyes weighted with sleep, happily greeting a day off from soon to be retirees as my heart sinks to new lows. Then the reality of what this phone call means... slamming that sledge hammer to my head with killer force. A scenario I know all too well. Noooooooo...... deep breaths... calm yourself... don't pick it up... gawd.... guilt... jeez... Gawd damn it!
I knew she was sick, really sick. Leaving work last night I called her. It's 8:30pm...
Clueless in Goldcreek answers, barely audible, her hoarse voice meekly speaks, "Hello?"
"Git you ass in bed!"
Laughing, "NO... it's to early. I wanna watch my new big TV."
"Git some whiskey with lemon and Git into bed!"
"I don't think I have any whiskey... maybe just a shot."
"Perfect! Slam it and Git in BED!
Laughing, "I will Farkle, after my show. I promise... I won't call in sick."
I knew she would, she should, and she did. :(
Farkle

Ranting... Raving... Lunatic

2009-06-01T21:15:00.000-07:00

And in conclusion... I have a mission. If I'm about to lose that which made me stick around for twenty six years, a sleuth I will become. One spindly necked, irate woman with OCD, on a mission to expose the wages and bonuses of every union employee. Starting with our majesty, "The President," all the way down to my local union representatives. Information that most certainly would like to be held privy... but is not.
I smell a rat.

In need of a little yellow pill,
Farkle

Never Could Keep It Shut

2009-05-31T09:33:00.000-07:00

Somebody's gonna be in deep doo doo and thinketh it might be me. I feel better though... And yes... I did send it.
Farkle

I am greatly distressed. Working for Mega Foods for 26 years, never having gone on L&I, paying dues faithfully and supporting your campaigns. My retirement was to be in December, the month of which I turned 55. I have de-generative bone disease, bad knees and feet. In hearing of our unions demise, I am sickened. Co-workers are opting out before you take away that which they have worked long and hard for. I fully understand the economic crisis and it's impact on our country, but from what I understand I will not be able to retire till I'm 65. You've got to be kidding... Two months shy of leaving a job of which has (due to repetition) destroyed my body. Two months...
And whilst I'm whining... allow me also to share my disbelief that my union rep never went and filed the paperwork that would have delayed Walmart's construction for three MORE years. (Guaranteed!) Saving hundreds of jobs, jobs that provide YOU with more support. I was reassured that she was coming to Tumwater on the very LAST day the CEPA report could be filed. Thus halting Walmart. I made it VERY clear that this had to be done by 4pm and she was a no show. Sad...
So I here I sit, planning on retiring with dignity and losing everything by two stinking months. I will not make it to 65 in the grocery business. The harsh reality of my predicament is truly one of life's cruelest blows.
Sincerely,
Farkle

Kiss My Ass

2009-05-30T21:30:00.001-07:00

Distressed would be putting it mildly. Arriving back at work to learn all my co-workers of "Like forever," are getting out. Even the one that was hired the same day as I, twenty six long years ago. Why? The pension. They may;
1. May take up to 25% away
2.Change age of retirement to 65
3. Take away spousals rights

So here I sit, no pot to piss in and yet I'm losing it all. Painfully watching others salvation by leaving while I'm just a few months shy and left hung to dry. Yes, I'm in the pity pot... and yes, I'll cry if I want to... and YES, the union can kiss my ass.

Farkle

Is There Power And Running Water?

2009-05-29T20:41:00.000-07:00

Update on hoarder:
It still sits along side the road, the weed still protruding from it's lid. Freakin weeks it's sat, undisturbed while the neighbor lady gets pissery with each passing moon. As the garbage truck approaches... again, she flags him down.
Banging on the driver side door, I motion for him to unroll his window. Yea, I know what he's thinking, "It's the crazy bitch," but I need to know for sure. Seeing as it has been I, cleaning up, then dragging it down, then dragging it back, then dragging it down and so on and so forth.
"Well? Didn't pay her bill, huh?"
Laughing while shaking his head, "I can't say."
(Oh, he's gonna tell me) "She didn't did she. Come on... you know I've been trying for years to clean it up. Did she or didn't she?"
Grinning now, looking at his computer screen, "Okaaaaay... let's just say, you're 8815 and the next house is 8819, annnnnnnnd there's absolutely nothin in between."
Farkle

Sharing Of A Gift

2009-05-28T22:19:00.000-07:00

I have a daughter that's gifted in many areas. Her writings have generated followings from people all over the world and now she also has taking up photography. I'm forever stealing those beautiful snapshots of O, and now she's captured one of her nephew. Grandson number two done in Elle fashion...
Farkle

The Manure Truck

2009-05-27T08:57:00.000-07:00

For the last several years cleaning goods in my home have been hand made. Sensitivity to the chemicals in cleaners provoked a mild case of asthma, triggering thought processes of; This can't be good for you. (duh) There was also the attributing factor of (beautimus) grandchildren. They work just as well, are mucho cheaper, and are non toxic.
Taking it a step further... gardening techniques. Using Ace as my work horse, every year we bring in fresh layer of composted soil. Thus minimizing the need for fertilizers. (Those too only organic)
This year, crossing the line completely. The lawn. Traveling a few miles down the road to speak with "Gary" of Black Lake Organics. Using his specialty made lawn fertilizer, the task of feeding our grass begins. Peeyoo... it stinks... it stinks real bad. Just like being stuck behind the manure truck driving down Little Rock. Moans heard as windows slam, my good name being cursed all over the neighborhood.
Hey, your kids can play safely over here... so kiss my ass! What do you mean they don't want to?
Farkle

Last Memorial Day

2009-05-26T09:07:00.000-07:00

Another holiday weekender at Maggot Foods. Ace reinforces the fact that it's my last as I hobble out the door to Yuksville. Swing on holidays opens the channels for drinkers and freakers. Oozing through our doors, attempting to be inconspicuous as to not hinder their shoplifting techniques. It's 9:30pm, the store is quiet except for the usual freeway stop and shoppers. A tall, thin, middle aged man, sets his grocery's on the belt. Teddy and I begin scrutinizing his odd mannerisms. Coldly making it apparent there is no need for pleasantry's to be exchanged.
"That'll be $12.32 please." He whips out a travelers check, signs it, scratches something out, rewrites something... but what? Handing me the check, he's shaking. Hmm... Scrutinizing it, "What was that you scratched out?"
Angrily "Just don't worry about it!'
"But what did it say?"
"I SAID, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT! NOW TAKE IT! TAKE IT AND JUST DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT! IT'S GOOOOD, YOU HAVE TO TAKE IT!"
"I need to see your ID please." Ooo... I really pissed him off now. Softly whispering to Teddy, "Intercom the Italian Stallion." Digging his wallet out, angrily holding up his ID. "Sir, I need you to take it out for me."
"YOU CAN SEE IT FROM THERE, CAN'T YOU? YOU DON'T NEED TO TOUCH IT!" (he does pull it out)
Remaining calm as to not antagonize him anymore, "Uh sir... you've got your thumb over the number."
Shaking, he removes his thumb. "THERE!"
(Insert heaving sigh) The Italian is now viewable, walking up the isle. (Phew)
Straining over the counter, I write the number on his check. (freeeeeeeak)

Teddy, "I thought he was gonna slap you..."

Another day for Farkle

LITTLE Smooching Time

2009-05-24T08:33:00.000-07:00

Gotta get my butt in gear this morning. (Duh... I have to work) My youngest is coming for an overnighter, baby in tow and her buddy Brian.
Had to post this picture... my life with Ace. =D
Farkle

Clothes For Mexico

2009-05-23T08:39:00.000-07:00

Farewell... parting is such sweet sorrow... My fleeting moment of glory and it's reward just bought us clothes. Big deal. I'm not a poser, never have been, never will be. Dresses ne'er to be worn, opting for blue jeans and tees my entire life. To appease Ace's nagging, I broke down, both of us tearing clothes off the racks at "Tar-jay." Balking at clothing and cars my entire life and continuing to do so till I die. As Ace and I cruise the freeway, you'll hear him exclaim,
"OH MY GAWD! LOOOOOK... a Cadillac CTS!" And my response, "Fricking posers... Loooook at me... Are you looking? I'm over here.... You're looking at me... I know you are.
Woo hoo, not impressed there, fella. Woot... your in debt up to your ass, Mr. Lame Brain.
Farkle and new clothes (woot)

What Stinks?

2009-05-21T22:28:00.000-07:00

It's the best looking one in the neighborhood. As the sun settles in the west, the last bits of light reflect off it, making it appear shinier then it truly is. Considered a valuable asset, most people make daily deposits, never forgetting it's important role in their lives. Everybody else's has been stowed away for the night, but not hers. A weed protrudes from it. (a weed?) Yup... she must not of payed her garbage bill, and ya know what? I'm not, nor Ace... not anyone... will be caught dragging that damn can back up her drive. (I'll break their arms) It'll sit there till it rots.
Farkle

Once Again

2009-05-20T23:25:00.000-07:00

Yawn... stretch... yawn....... Damn it! Swing shift, a ditsy woman and a futile attempt to settle down for the night.
Up till the wee hours, Farkle

No Worries...

2009-05-19T20:43:00.000-07:00

It feels so weird not having a telephone. Another mad attempt to scale back so I can retire with or without my pension. Our only link to society when home, the internet and cell phones. As with any of my quests to save the almighty dollar there always is a price to pay. Yesterday, the first day without our phone service.
"Uh, ya need to call your sister and let her know. If theres an emergency, she needs to know how to get a hold of us." (Wow, he actually listened)
"Hey sis, it's me. I'm calling cause Farkle and I no longer have a .... Damn it! Verizon, you bastards! Hi, it's me again, that was weird, we've never dropped a .... Damn it! This is really pissing me off! Fricking Verizon!"
Meekly muttering," sorry... " oh like half a dozen times. His third attempt allows him to explain our new set of circumstances due to his lovely wife before........
Farkle

Oh Yea!

2009-05-18T22:59:00.000-07:00

We won... we won! $450 bucks, proudly lugged out the doors of Little Creek. Two hooting and hollering geeks, grinning and high fiving each other all the way home. We're disgusting...
Oh yea, baby...
Farkle

Online Cookbook... Woot!

2009-05-17T19:09:00.000-07:00

My original idea was to type out all my eclectic recipes, (the ones tried and true) and file them away in this cute little notebook purchased from "Tar-jay." Over the course of many years, I have collected numerous. Stuffed in unimaginable places, like my bathroom drawers, underwear drawers... you name it. Gawd... Anyhoo, it dawned on me, this will take days, months, maybe even years to sort... and then came a solution. My new and improved idea, an "Online Cookbook." It's handy, you can share, and most of all... the storage space and organizing capability's are endless. So there you have it. Another never ending project, for someone with OCD and that agonizing drive for perfection. Crap...
Farkle

Please Look Before You Leap!

2009-05-16T22:21:00.000-07:00

Major coronary tonight. Preparing for an early get up, (I have a morning shift) I make my coffee for morning wake up. Oh... it's still way too hot for me to have closed the slider door, so taking a brief interlude from my preparations, I open it. Going back to what I was doing, I just happen to look up. Oh dear God... closet kitty is outside, cautiously walking off the deck. (Damn... the screen door wasn't shut) My heart stops momentarily, then begins racing like that Camaro Ace is always fantasizing on.
"Here kitty kitty... Tessie.... come here baby girl..." Does she? Hell no. Franticly I grab a tail, she screams, I scream... and all is well. Kinda...
Farkle

Neurosis In The House

2009-05-14T22:16:00.000-07:00

There is only one thing harder for my cat to endure other then Zena, (my parents Jack Russell), that's my grandson. Prozac for kitties. An idea heavily mulled every time she heads for the closet. Her last two days spent under my quilt. A pitiful lump in my military style made bed. Cleaning up cat puke for two days due to snarfing food at insane rates. Her desire to get back to the closet or under my bedspread, out of control. What a great idea for a new reality show... "Neurosis In The House."
Farkle

Oh...

2009-05-13T21:19:00.000-07:00

Tucked snugly in bed, (next to his new vacuum) "O." Reassuring him unnecessary, there are no worries. We go through the drill though...
"Ya know... I'm right in the next room. If you call me, I'll come running. You know how much I love you... right?"

"And if I get scared... I can sleep with you."

"Yup."

"But Babada... I'm not scared."

"Oh... "
Farkle

FRIDAY For Me... WOOT!

2009-05-12T09:16:00.001-07:00

Fresh from Evergreen college, organic seeds. Yup, I missed the seed exchange, but Herb Deb hit the triple bars. Although unaware it was a seed swap, arriving empty handed didn't stop them from sharing! SCORE! So rain or shine I'm planting before entering the Twilight Zone. Yea... swing.

Tomorrow, exploring a new nursery with my beautimus daughter, bringing some much needed, awesome relief from the drama of Maggot Foods. If the little guy (my breath of fresh air) is up for it I'll be returning home with him for an overnighter.

Just Pass By The Jello...

2009-05-11T11:24:00.000-07:00

Our cruise is right around the corner. (maybe) Disturbingly, a paranormal force has taken up residence in our blissful bubble we call home. Fearful are we, paranoia setting center stage in our lives. That which was once filled with peace and harmony, now replaced with agonizing terror. Normality nonexistent... This evil... this demonic force, resides in our kitchen cupboards. Who would ever have thought such a thing to be possible. Somehow, someway, entering our Jello boxes, stored innocently away for one of those holiday occasions.Unbeknown to us, we consumed, and now... attached to our bellies, in freakish form.... IT. Gawking at each other, spirits shattered like that pickle jar on isle 2. Crap... Smoothies the breakfast for champions and the next best thing to "Ghost Busters."
Farkle
I know... it makes no sense.

Neglecting Ace :(

2009-05-09T21:19:00.000-07:00

Just made my first batch of tub olive oil and butter. Ridiculously easy... and much cheaper and healthier then store bought. Been busy ever since I got home from the "Hole" and now gotta go spend some time with my guy.
Farkle

Father Time

2009-05-08T20:00:00.000-07:00

Sadly our ginormous clock says 8pm, meaning my day off is screeching to a halt. Accelerated rates of time, making me dizzy... like I'm at a fair. Remember that ride? Spinning and whirling so fast the momentum keeps you pinned to the wall? So what the hell happened here? I get up, dress, and then Wam, Bam, Thank Ya Mam, it's over? Weeks ago it was "Mother Nature," hated and deplored. Now "Father Time" begins stepping on toes of which are already screaming.
Uh... we need to have a little chat, "Father." Really... if you can make the hands of time plod on work days, surely you can work a little magic for those days that I'm off. Forever would you be my reigning prince, my shining star, an ember that burst into flames at the mere mention of your name.
Forever grateful, Farkle

Bountiful Blessings

2009-05-07T09:34:00.000-07:00

I awoke smiling today.... weird. Feeble minded for days, anger and fretting consuming my spirit and joy. Plastering that smile deemed necessary for customers while inside I'm choking. My ancestors survived the Great Depression, losing everything. Struggling to feed broods while still maintaining a sense of family. My losses, although painful are nil in comparison. My home is intact and so is my family. My belly bulges from overindulging and most importantly... I am loved. If and when I leave this planet, one thing is for certain. I had everything most can only dream of. I want for nothing...
Farkle

North Or South

2009-05-06T10:01:00.001-07:00

Today a no brainer for Farkle Land. "Sprouting Off" got my daily post. =)
Farkle

Maybe A Colon Cleanse Will Help :[

2009-05-05T09:04:00.000-07:00

Yippee... embracing the fact I'm off today, I must get ready for the dentist. I still have my teeth... for this I am thankful. Split days off provide me with what seems like a shorter work week, for this I am thankful. Uh... raining, (again) watering my garden, for this I am thankful. Tomorrow, work swing... reuniting with all my friends whom are worse off then I. (I work, they don't. Why are they smiling?) Uh... positive thoughts bring positive rewards. I watched "The Secret."
Note to myself;
re watch movie
wander downtown
eat nothing but beans and rice for one week
drop by all street corners today (getting encouragement from friends)
Farkle #!!###!!##!!!

Part 3 Of "You Affect Me Negatively..."

2009-05-04T22:07:00.000-07:00

I'm really getting peeved. Today learning not only can "They" make me wait... they can make me wait longer. Like till I'm 66. As if one foot dangling in my grave weren't enough pain for one to endure, they could also take away a percentage of my pension. Just watch your asses there fellas... someone with OCD is gonna be doing research on YOUR Wages and Bonuses. Shouting "FOUL!" so loud the entire nation will hear.
Farkle At War

Part 2 of "You Affect Me Negatively..."

2009-05-03T08:10:00.000-07:00

Still not happy.
Options:
1. Be utterly poor for 71/2 years
2. work
If only I didn't like pretty things...
Farkle

You Affect Me Negatively In The Following Ways...

2009-05-02T20:57:00.000-07:00

It's so troubling. The union reps who were supposed to come in and speak with us were a no show. Nope... they went to the other store, the one that views us as wicked stepchildren. Passed through the grapevine that October is the cut off date for early retirement. Meaning I'd miss it by two months. Of course no ones future is ever set in stone, especially in a recession but this is truly perverse injustice. The irony of the entire situation will be felt as my coworkers retire, leaving behind one heartbroken youngster. (me) Seniors (of one month) whom warrant respect and admiration for a job well done . (SO not laughing) I bow to you. (Sobbing)
Farkle

Friends

2009-05-01T21:12:00.000-07:00

Today I trucked to the big town of McCleary to visit the "Queen." Stopping first at Bark and Garden to meet up with Debbie. Chomping our way through the herbs and purchasing the most delectable to make a garden. Employees gawk while the two Greeners can be heard saying "Taste this one, Mmm... and try this... Mmm..."
Broken nose, casted arm, and scraped up, she greets me at the door. Circumstances are always tossed into life, ones which bring joy or the ones that bring pain. In this instance it's the latter. An herb garden, hopefully to ease a little ache of not only her body but her heart. We love you...
Farkle

More Pollen

2009-04-30T10:57:00.000-07:00

Got more gardening to do so snagged a couple photos of two of my favs. O... of course adorable... and Elle, kicking herself for not buying those shoes.
Farkle

It's His Shoes

2009-04-29T21:02:00.000-07:00

Phew... I ran all day. Mowing the lawn, hair appointments and then a wild sprint to family court. In an attempt to get passports, Ace set the metal detector off (again) halting us momentarily, but after proving not to be armed and dangerous we made it to the reception desk. Nixing the entire thing, a "Closed" sign hanging above the Passports station. Lady luck has been against us, so why on earth would we...........
head to the casino. I WON, I WON! One Hundred sixty one buckaroos on their money. Sweeeeeet!
Farkle

I'm So Happpppy... So... Sooo... Happppy!

2009-04-28T12:51:00.000-07:00

Busy today murdering plants. My barberry bush now looks as if someone stuck sticks in the ground, my hydrangeas... only time will tell. My gratitude for the rain, backdropped by grey skies is overwhelming. As the water soaks my shoes and clothes, it is with great honor I look up to the heavens. Profusely spouting "Thank You, thank you, for cleansing our great earth!" Joyfully I head to the shower to remove pollen that has me gagging, (I do it ever so lady like) since I've been afforded the opportunity to work swing. Just chillin with my disturbed customers and making a little money. Woot! (it's all about attitude)
Farkle

Bitchy Woman

2009-04-27T20:31:00.000-07:00

Frickin laundry, frickin Mexican pandemic, frickin Maggot Foods, frickin Unions, frickin popcorn kernels stuck in my teeth, and a the biggest fatty "frick" to my shift tomorrow. And that frickin alarm... can you say annoying. My dryers handy dandy built in feature. One of the most annoying sounds in the world when one wants to plant their ass for the night. Beep, beep, beeeeep... Beep, beep, beeeeep...
Someone needs to regroup.
Farkle

A Feast

2009-04-26T20:44:00.000-07:00

Worked till 8pm and back at 9am. Slipped into my jammies and now am preparing to dig into Aces bountiful dinner of chicken and veggies. Sigh... I'm tired.
Farkle